Wednesday, 25 January 2012

I got into RYL forums

Finally registering worked (for recoveryourlife.com), here's my post from today:

I went into town today and I milled about the clinic for a while. I couldn't figure out what to say.. so I went to the pharmacy and spent $50 on first aid stuff. I bought steri-strips (like butterfly bandages), some sterile bandages, bandaids, mederma scar gel and saline wound wash. 

Obviously a bandaid isn't going to fix it - but I thought since it's on my wrist, and not a joint or anything, I might be able to hold the skin together with enough steri-strips that it'll keep the scarring to a minimum. Because the nearest town to my house is very small (and without a hospital), it's not like I can walk in and remain anonymous or never see that doctor again. I just have no idea what to say. I thought about saying I slipped down the stairs from my hayloft, and caught my arm on some nails or something trying to catch myself. 

I did just realize I need to go in soon to get more asthma puffers, maybe by then it'll look a little better and at least I can get her to check for infection. 

(Someone assumed I was young, I responded to her); I'm really not that young. 23 next month (supposed to be living my 'adult life' now and am utterly failing at it. My mom's very judgemental and I think it would make all my problems worse if she found out.) 

I enjoy cutting. The more I do it, the more I seem to enjoy it. But at the same time, I hate the scars and having to hide it (yeah, I still live with my mother), and every time I do it I end up cutting deeper and deeper. So maybe this will remind me why not to, the next time I want to.. I hope.

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